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My Betrayal Led to My Wifes Betrayal, But We Saved Our Marriage

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Many people don\'t realize how damaging betrayal is to a marriage relationship. My betrayal, which I did not realize at the time, was betrayal, led to my wife betraying me even tho I thought we had reconciled our marriage. In this article I am going to tell a little about our situation and how we saved our marriage. In doing so, I hope to help anyone who is having relationship problems of there own so that they will have some steps to follow to save their marriage.

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Many people don't realize how damaging betrayal is to a marriage relationship. My betrayal, which I did not realize at the time, was betrayal, led to my wife betraying me after I thought we had reconciled our marriage. In this article I am going to tell a little about our situation and how we saved our marriage. In doing so, I hope to help anyone who is having relationship problems of there own so that they will have some steps to follow to save their marriage.

I am going to tell you a little background information about us as a couple first. We are both relatively laid back people. I am generally laid back. She is a little more temperamental than me. We had been together for fourteen years. Ten of that was marriage. We had a relatively stable marriage most of the time. But as time passed, the little things that you never think will bother you began to bother each of us. I am pretty quiet and have a hard time expressing myself at times so I just withdrew further into my shell. She withdrew from the physical aspects of our marriage and began to be less accommodating about the things I did express to her. I was not being the husband that I should be and she was not being the wife that she should be. It was beginning to show. I was miserable and I now know that she was also.

As I said, I had become miserable. When it reached the point that I could take it no more, I began discussing my situation with a woman that works with me. She was very understanding and being a friend of mine, she attempted to help me get through the tough time I was facing. As the weeks turned into months we became closer and closer until we were sharing all kinds of secrets with each other and spending all large amount of time talking to each other. Obviously a bond had been formed but nothing of a physical nature ever happened. She also was married and we thought we were just good friends although I now realize that we took it way too far.

One night I left the house to go for a ride and ended up going by their house. The three of us and a few other friends had a good visit and a few drinks. Time passed before I realized and it was late when I got home. My wife had been asleep, but when she realized what time it was and that I had just come home, the stuff hit the fan. I spilled my guts to her, telling her how miserable I was and that if things could not change I wanted a divorce. It took weeks of analyzing and discussing but I thought we finally had our problems worked out and would move forward.

Fast-forward a few months. She had made an effort to change some things that I wanted changed. I had made an effort to be better at expressing my feelings instead of holding them all inside. Then one night tempers flared and in the heat of the moment I told her she had not changed much. Apparently, this set her off. She later told me that this was when she gave up and decided that I did not want her. She is a very religious woman so she would not commit sexual adultery but before you knew it she had an old boyfriend that she was confiding in instead off me.

I did not really realize what was going on. She told me about conversations with this man but we were all in the same social group so I did not think anything about it. Then one day I happened to see the cell phone bill. There were thousands of text exchanges taking place between the two of them as well as several hours worth of phone calls every week to each other. I was devastated and heartbroken. So I addressed the issue with her. She told me that she had pretty much given up on me but had no intention of leaving me and was extremely embarrassed that she had let it go this far.

We really both loved each other. We had just gotten off track. We had to figure out a way to work our problems out. I vowed to be more open about my feelings and she vowed not to be so hard on me about the ones she did not like. And we started searching for help. We found many programs but they all focused on things that did not pertain to us.

We began using a system that was supposed to help overcome betrayal issues in a marriage. Most people don't realize marriage betrayal is so damaging. It took us a little time and commitment but by using this system I am happy to say that our marriage is in a better place than it has ever been. I would suggest you find a system to help with your relationship problems also.

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